50 Shades of Kiki

50 shades

Lock the doors, lower the blinds, fire up the smoke machine and put on your heels-it’s about to get real up in this bitch. Let’s have a Kiki! For those of you that have lived under a rock, a Kiki is a party, for calming all your nerves. We’re spilling tea, and dishing just desserts one may deserve. In this week’s Kiki, we will be  pulling out the whips and chains and pushing play on Rihanna’s “S&M” as we talk about 50 Shades of Grey

50 Shades of Grey is makes Magic Mike look like an Oscar worth movie. Now I haven’t seen the movie nor have I read any of the books, but I have done enough research to know that it’s a horrible franchise. It’s a Twilight fan fiction for one, which should have been a massive red flag to begin with. On top of that, it’s like someone watched a porn, took heavily detailed notes, and stuck a title on it with some slight changes and called it a book. Actually, calling this book a porn is giving the porn industry a bad name because porn has more depth to their plot lines than this franchise. And just like Twilight, it makes you want to slap the bitch and the face and go “Bitch, leave his ass! You be straight cray” until you realize that this bitch likes it rough. Just from reading the synopsis of the first book and my knowledge of Twilight, I can already sum up the plot of the entire thing:

Stupid Female: I know I shouldn’t love you but I just can’t stop myself

Mr. Grey: The safety word is “Banana”

Stupid Female: You’re not good for me

Mr. Grey: You didn’t say “Banana”

Sadly, my summary of the plot seems to better 100x better than the actual plot of the book. If you plan on watching the movie or reading the book, I recommend getting a safety word because it will be your only way out of pain.

That Kiki was Marvelous!!! Want to join in on the Kiki? Leave us a comment down below!

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