It’s the summer of douchebaggery as 16 strangers compete to see which one will win the title of Asshole of the Year as well as $500,000. It’s time for Big Brother 17 here in the states. And this year, it’s a full of 2 people that failed to race around the world and 14 strangers that looked like they found in a people’s version of Walmart’s $5 CD bin.
Each week, I’ll be breaking down that week’s events and stating my opinion of it because that’s what I do. Now before I get to the week. Here’s my short and saucy statements of each houseguest:
Audrey: Queen of Chaos and Mayhem
Austin: He’s alright
Becky: Bitch, got hit by a train; she’s kinda just there…like she doesn’t do anything and is kind of a hoe.
Clay: He’s more than a pretty face
Da’Vonne: Jocasta wannabe–but less likable
Jackie: She’s still in the house???
James: Donny wannabe
Jason: Lives in his mother’s basement because he’s unlikeable-ish
Jace: dude, is annoying af
Jeff: douchebag of the week, playa. Also, I pretty sure he has a mancrush on Clay
John: I’m not letting him near any of my teeth because he’s shadier than a Tree in the afternoon
Liz/Julia: I’ll get to them later on….
Meg: I nominate her for being annoying af…her and Jace could have had a showmance and been more annoying than Brenchel (yes, it could have been possible)
Shelli: Mama puma is on the hunt, and Clay is her prey
Steve: Sliently but not so deadly unless backed into a corner
Vanessa: She’s okay
So this week on Big Brother was probably the most chaotic first week that I have ever seen. So much was going on and it was grand. So let’s start off with the fact that all the nominee’s pre-veto were all pawns this week because half of the house wanted to get Jace out of the house since Day 2. There was this big eight person alliance that pretty much formed because Audrey decided to keep adding to the like four or five person alliance that started. On top of that, like five more alliances started up and then eventually they were all in multiple alliances with each other. Majority of those failed…no surprise there.
James was still the HOH after the god awful Battle of the Block competition (I hate the Battle of the Block to begin with because it’s a stupid). Jackie and Steve were the nominee pawns left before Steve won the Power of Veto to pull him, which is how Jace got nominated. In case you haven’t guessed, I’m skipping over the BB takeover because I don’t remember it besides the fact it gave us Jeff and Jackie….a wonderful gift that we should give back. Anyways, Jace got evicted 12-1, which Audrey shaking up the votes after she was shunned by some of the house because of her “lies,” which it’s not Big Brother without some lies.
Now onto the twin twist….the twins are Liz and Julia and it’s pretty obvi that they aren’t totally like because I got it on the live feeds. Also, we are at the point where Big Brother is reusing old twists…they officially have ran out of twistedly twisted twist. How in the hell do they not notice this? They wear their hair different also and one was a rounder face than the other.
Overall, this has been an exciting week in BB. Hopefully, they continue the trend with Becky and Shelli as the new HOH…they will run the house just like the train that ran down Becky.