Sigh. Looks like we need to talk more about Trump
On Tuesday night, Donald Trump tweeted out the following:
Big day planned on NATIONAL SECURITY tomorrow. Among many other things, we will build the wall!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 25, 2017
As planned out during his campaign, which I think a lot of us thought he was joking, President Trump and his team, Cirque du Trump, said that he was going to build a legitimate wall separating the United States and Mexico. The kicker is that Mexico is going to pay for it. This has me intrigued and here’s why.
I really want to see why how Trump talks another country into paying for a wall that is pretty much cutting them off from the US. That would take some clever wordplay and psychology-something that Trump isn’t really known for. I also don’t think he realizes how much this wall is going to cost. According to the Telegraph (sorry that I had to outsource), the wall is going to be roughly 1,900 miles and span four states. That’s going be a lot of money. Especially when you take the exchange rate into mind. They are saying that it will be around $8 billion. While that’s not a lot of Trump, that could pretty much bankrupt a country if they aren’t run by Trump.
In his inauguration speech, President Trump said: “We must protect our borders from the ravages of other countries making our products, stealing our companies and destroying our jobs.” So how is building a wall stopping Mexican’s from making our products? It’s not like we are building sometime top-secret that anyone can’t make. They really can’t steal our companies or destroy our jobs either. If you have the Mexican government pay for the wall, won’t they be using their own workforce to build the wall. That will steal jobs from Americans though. Seems like that’s the opposite of what you said.
The real question about the wall is whether it is going to have a food court. Let’s be real: that wall is a tourist attraction. It better has some damn good food. I also want a freaking mall of goods and services. I want to be able to say Hola! and grab some Orange Julius with some amigos with a big wall between us. Is that so hard to ask? It’s going to be HUUUUUGGGGEEE!
If we build a wall to keep Mexico out, then we might as build one for Canada and the merpeople. I thought about the United States needing a wall for Russian but then I remembered about Sarah Palin having it covered by watching them from her compound because she can see them from her backyard. Who needs board control when you have Sarah Palin? Back to Canadians and merpeople. Those pesky and polite Canadians have already taken away jobs with their delicious Tim Hortons. Let’s not forgot about all the talented and attractive Canadian entertainers that have taken jobs from their less talented American counterparts who think they are the next big thing. What else will this talented and polite country take from America, eh?
The merpeople are vicious creatures. Their women are vixens and seduce American men into marriage every day. Did you know that one in five American males is to be seduced by a mermaid every day? I bet you didn’t. Did also you know that one in seven women is to be seduced by a merman? Those are chilling statistics. Ariel seduced Eric just so she can be a legal citizen. Then her people attack the country when her daughter went missing. These are the alternative facts people. We need to act now before American sons/daughters fall for a mermaid/merman and take away a significant other from an American.
All in all, let’s see what becomes of this wall. And if the wall doesn’t happen, we’ll just move Sarah Palin down to the Mexican border to watch over it since Donald Trump seems to be in good with the Vladmir Putin. The Russians are under control. But we need to work fast to stop the merpeople and the polite and pesky Canadians. They are the real danger.
Have an opinion on the wall? Let us know in the comments below or tweet @Steven_Kaufman using #PopProject.