HGTV: Pure evil and impossible dreams


 

hgtv-sm

I have found a channel that is more evil than Food Network! Hell, there is probably a legion of doom of channels that are getting off to the fact that most of its viewers are drowning¬†in tears and their hopes and dreams have been crushed. HGTV was Pinterest before Pinterest was a thing. So let’s have a chat of why HGTV is PURE EVIL!

HGTV is a channel that likes to think they helping you find and create your dream home. But what they really do is that they show you homes that you could only afford if you robbed a bank or won the lottery. The people who are finding houses or homes on this channel must really have some money because I know that most people I know definitely don’t have a couple $500,000 to spend on a place. And if you were going to get a loan, then you better have enough people to live in that house because you won’t be able to afford it. What the point of living in a home that will literally let you not enjoy it?

Don’t worry, while you are living in your dark, cold, home, because you couldn’t anything afford anything else, they will also show how to proper decorate it and cause you to be even more in debt. Like, half of the ways they designing and decorating are freaking expensive. It’s kind of like they are forcing you to choose between your dream home or dream decor? That’s so evil of them. Oh, it’s gets even worse from because I’m pretty sure that HGTV’s plan is to make everyone bankrupt. But hey, at least you are living in a gorgeous and well designed home. Who needs food, internet, water? That stuffs for people who aren’t living in their dream home.

But don’t worry, if you want to be practical and don’t want to send yourself into years of debt and no friends because you don’t bathe, then you can learn how to spend money on renovating your home to turn in it into your dream home. They have plenty of show were you can get “oh, I want to do that to my room.” So you try to do that and but you fail miserable because there isn’t really a how to guide. So you just took out a wall for nothing. But hey, at least you have more of a breeze.

Have you ever noticed how you want to hit the people on the shows? Like they are just pricks and just literally whine all the time. “This house doesn’ have this” and “This house yard doesn’t room by boat.” It’s like they pick the most picky people to be on the freaking channel. I totally get and understand that you are looking for the perfect home but these people are just flat-out douches. They want all this shit for a small budget and don’t seem to understand that they might not get all that they want. This is what I think of when I hear them:

Like if you have $500,000 just lying around to buy this home, then you could just add it on later down the line. HGTV will help show you about renovation, or hell-maybe you can be on another one of their TV shows and they’ll do it for you.

HGTV is lets you watch people buy and live in your dreams. That’s some messed up shit that the Food Network doesn’t even do to you. HGTV is literally showing you your dream home and then having other people buy it right in front of you. Where’s the puppy that they are going to let you love then take away? That would be less painful that this shit. Only the evil of the evil will let you watch people buy and live in your dream home.

Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Make sure you give my Twitter a follow for the sake of the children. 

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