Pop Project Explains: Met Gala 2019 Fashion

On Monday, May 6, the 71st annual Met Gala was a thing again. If you don’t know what that is then you need to get with the times. The Met Gala is a fundraising event for Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Costume Institute in New York City. It also marks the opening of the Costume Institute’s annual fashion exhibit. This is the event that all the celebrities wear their best costumes. Because of this, I decided to put on my fashion blogger hat and chat about some of the costumes and my thoughts. This years theme was camp. So naturally, only gay men and women knew what the hell that means.

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What the hell is camp?

Don’t feel bad if you don’t have any idea what camp is. You will soon find out that some people didn’t even know what it meant. Or they just don’t care. So here’s the wikipedia definition of Camp

Camp is an aesthetic style and sensibility that regards something as appealing because of its bad taste and ironic value. Camp aesthetics disrupt many of modernism’s notions of what art is and what can be classified as high art by inverting aesthetic attributes such as beauty, value, and taste through an invitation of a different kind of apprehension and consumption.

Wikipedia page

So now that we got that out of the way, let’s get into some of these fashions.

Nick and Priyanka Jonas

Oh, Where do I begin with this. I think it might be best to start off with this: Nick Jonas has proven that not everyone can look super hot all of the time. While I can appreciate their take on glitter, I don’t know what this is suppose to be. Priyanka looks like a glittery alien queen while Nick looks like a 1970s gay porn star with tendencies to like little children and lure them with candy into his van/cult. Please, Nick, for the love of Jonas, don’t ever get a mustache like that. The world and I thank you in advance.

Nick was wearing a white suit with Dior Men with glittery gray shoes that look like it was made from her dress. Apparently Dior Men’s suit are for cult leaders. Priyanka looks like she killed some poor creature that invaded her home planet and had it weaved into Dior Haute Couture. Sadly, this wasn’t the weirdest outfit from the night.

Katy Perry

Someone call Disney! One of the dancing chandeliers from “Beauty and the Beast” on Broadway escaped storage and ended up at the Met Gala. Oh, sorry that is just Katy Perry. Now I don’t know why someone would want to wear something that looks as uncomfortable as it probably feels. Especially with how many battery packs was needed to keep everything lit. But don’t worry, she didn’t this all night.

Katy Perry then decided to dress up as a hamburger. Yep, she went from a chandelier to a hamburger. From the lighting of a fancy dinner to something you can get from something off the dollar menu. While I appreciate their bold fashion choices, I really don’t understand them. I get fashion isn’t suppose to be comfortable but there’s no fashionable reason for anything she is wearing.

Katy’s hamburger outfit was made by McDonald’s. I hear that she wanted Wendy’s to make her outfit but they don’t make fake burgers.

Kim Kardashian and Kayne West

Only Kim Kardashian West would make looking almost completely naked a look for Met Gala. Kim told one of the media that she wanted to look like she was wearing a wet t-shirt. Unless you’re wearing a stripper’s shirts, I would like to know what shirt is that transparent to where it matches your skin color so well. It looks more like floppy skin than it is a wet t-shirt. She also looks like a sci-fi movie villain. A villain that is looking to steal peoples youth as she clings onto relevancy. She also kind of looks like a condom.

Kayne West is dressed like he is picked up his outfit off of the rack of Walmart. Apparently, Yeezey’s jacket was $40. Pretty much, Kayne is all of us if we couldn’t spend countless thousands of dollar on a fancy outlandish outfit. Kayne also looks like he’s going to murder someone and he’s carrying around the body, Kim, as a memento in the back of his van.

Celine Dion

Oh, Celine Dion. She’s the only person that can pull off looking like a peacock. I feel bad for the people that was sitting behind her. The tea of the entire outfit that Celine didn’t know what camp was. She thought they were talking about camping. I know have visions of Celine coming to the Met Gala as a tent or a boy scout. They would have probably been even better than looking like an extremely gay peacock trying to blind their lover with their sparkles.

The fact that Celine Dion has no idea what camp is makes everything seem even better. I can just picture her reactions to everything. The awe and the amazement to the world around her. Just a new born gay sparkly peacock just sitting there in amazement of a huge ass hamburger or a man holding onto his own head.

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen

It appears the Grim Reaper took a day off to take some of the celebrities careers at the Met Gala. Oh, I’m sorry that just Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. Now I’m poking fun at the fact they look like death. But rather they decided to make their own theme where they are just wearing black leather dresses. One is wearing yellow. I’m honestly not sure which one is which at this point. But it’s very obvious that they might have a thing for leather. They do dress alike so maybe the camp is the fact they are dressed alike. I honestly don’t know. I just hope they didn’t take anyone’s careers. If they did, my money is on Kimye. It would cause the least amount of waves.

In my research in trying to figure who is who, I noticed a trend of them of wearing darker tones to the past Met Galas. Are they trying to hide something or just try to be dark and brooding? One tends to lighten it up a little but it’s still dark. I’m starting to wonder if they are vampires.

There was too many fashions to go over that occurred. Like Jared Leto holding his own head, Zendaya turning into Cinderella, or whatever the hell Cardi B was wearing. I highly recommend googling the outfits. It’s a joy. The same joy you got by reading this piece

Leave your thoughts/tea in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more of that tea.

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Fashion Police: Winter Edition

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You have the right to remain stylish

In case you weren’t aware, today is the first day of winter. Because it’s a new season, people are getting a new outfits in order to deal with the changing of weather. You don’t want people to think you are unfashionable and I don’t want to people to think that about you. So I put on my fashion blogger hat on and I’m here to help you not get a fine. So let’s dive into winter fashion.

Click here to check out what fall fashion crimes not to do

So the majority of the fall fashion crimes still will get you hefty fine and jail time for it during the winter season. I’m not going to repeat those, I’ve already linked it under the sexy deputy if you want to find out what not to do. For this edition, we are just going to talk about the biggest fashion crime of this winter season: fucking wearing pajamas in public establishments.

Now, I’m not sure if it’s everywhere but I’ve seen a lot of people wearing pajamas in public establishments and they are over the age of like 4. Now, I totally understand that there are “certain circumstances” that makes it slightly okay to wear them but those only work if you are going through a drive-through. Look, I’m just going to be blunt. The only way you can pull off wearing pajamas in public is to either not do it or wear pajamas that aren’t really pajamas.

It probably takes around like less than a minute in order to change out of your pajamas and put on like actual clothes. No one said that it has to be jeans. You could wear sweatpants than pajamas if you were looking to be comfortable. Hell, you could even wear the must dredded legging as pants over pajamas. Now, I still belive that leggings are giving pants a bad name, but you will look better in the long run wearing them than pajamas.

Wearing pajamas in public doesn’t set the right kind of image for you. You slightly look like you could give two shits about yourself. If you look like that, then you will feel like that. You should wear clothes that will make you feel confident, especially if you aren’t really feeling that yourself. Sure, wearing pajamas will make you comfortable and happy for a little bit but it’s only a temporary burst. If you were to wear clothes that make you look good, then you would feel good and be happy because every time you saw yourself then you would go “damn I look good.” Also, wearing pajamas in public is extremely tacky.

You are probably wondering what is your sentence will be if caught wearing pajamas in public. Well, you will have to do $60,000 in fines, 140 months in jail, and 400 hours of community service as a retail work. So, think about that the next time you are thinking about wearing your pajamas out in public.

Leave your thoughts in the comment below. Make sure you follow me of Twitter for more what to wear. 

Fashion Police: Fall fashion crimes

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You have the right to remain, stylish

Fall is literally around the corner and it’s time for me to put on my fashion blogger hat. We’re going to talk about the things not to wear this fall. I want to save you the pain and suffering of having people look at you like someone who just woke up in a new decade after being cryogenically frozen for decades.

So here is some fashion don’t to do this fall. You’re welcome:

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Think about how cold Ariana’s shoulders are

Oversized jackets

Fall will be colder and you will be forced to start wearing more layers when heading outside. Most people will start wearing a coat or a jacket. Please make sure that the jacket fits you. The point of wearing a jacket is to keep you warm. A large jacket lets too much air flow in and defeats the purpose of it, besides the fact that you will look like ridiculous in it. You pretty much look like a jackass. There are only a few people who look cool wearing one and that comes at a price.

While Ariana Grande does look cool with her extremely large jacket, that may or may not house a family of four, her shoulders are probably extremely cold. Also, it really makes wearing a jacket more of an effort than it should be. I would assume that it’s like wearing too large of pants without a belt. You spent more time holding them up than actually wearing them. Just save yourself the trouble and wear something that is stylish and that will fit you. If you are caught wearing an oversize jacket, it’s a $1000 fine and up to 10 years in prison.

Extremely long and baggy sweaters

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You cannot tell me that she doesn’t look silly in that sweater

This goes into oversized jackets but it’s SO bad that it deserves its own category. If the sweater/hoody/shirt hangs down to your knees, then you should go return it because you aren’t cool. You just look like an idiot. If the shirt looks like a dress, then go put on a freaking dress. You will look better, to begin with, because dresses are fancy af.

If you are unable to return that tent that you call a sweater, you can use it as a wrap, a shaw, and as a something for your cats to sleep in. Attach balls to the sleeves and your cats will also have a new toy. Hell, you could probably use that as a blanket for yourself. I’d even keep it in your car in case you need something to stay warm with or something to place on your seat if snow gets on it during the harsh winter months. I’m pretty sure this makes me the Martha Stewart of fashion – minus the weed, jail time, and knowing Snoop Dogg. I’d be lucky to know Will Smith. Snoop Dogg is way too cool for me to know or be friends with. Wearing a sweater that goes down to your knees will get you 10-15 in prison with 500 hours of community service.

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There’s no reason to wear high heels with leggings

Leggings as pants

This one is a pet peeve of mine. I’m totally fine for wearing leggings as pants when you are lounging around the house but for heaven’s sake, PLEASE STOP FUCKING WEARING THEM ALL THE TIME. You might as well just go out in public in your underwear because that’s pretty much all that you are wearing. I had a girl give a presentation one time wearing a short shirt and leggings and every time she would reach up to point at something, I could see her ovaries. If I wanted to see that, then I would have asked. I didn’t want to get an anatomy lesson during my psychology class.

If you are working out, then they are also fine but they aren’t supposed to replace your actual pants. They are really supposed to go underneath a dress or a skirt. Hell, you could wear a pair underneath your jeans. Oh, and wearing high heels with leggings is like wearing shorts with a winter jacket. It’s counterproductive. If you are wearing them to be comfortable, then wearing high heels totally makes your argument for them irrelevant like Nickelback has been for the last 22 years. Being caught wearing leggings in public as a form of pants will get you 50 years in prison with an additional 50 years if you are also caught wearing heels with leggings.

Man Buns

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This picture alone is a reason not to have a man bun

I don’t know about you but man buns are something that I can’t pull off. Hell, 80% of the men that have man buns can’t even pull them off. If you have a man bun, then please release the bun and just wear it down, cut it off, or wear it in a ponytail. Wearing a man ban just make you look ridiculous if you are unable to pull it off. I’m not even going to explain how to pull it off because frankly, it’s a lost art. It’s like trying to tell someone how to breathe properly. Yeah, there are different ways but there’s not one right way.

 

If you grew your hair out for the sake of getting a man bun, just cut it off now and save time. Donate that hair and move on because you are probably in the at 80% that cannot pull it off. If you are caught with a man bun and cannot pull it off, you will have to clean gutters for 10,000 hours of community service. You also get a participation award for trying it.

Scarves

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Why wear a scarf with a cutoff?

This one is just like having a man bun, but rather in a common sense standpoint. It’s fucking too early to be busting out of the scarves. Whether you’re a male or a female, it’s only dropping to less than hot temperatures, not like its arctic tundra. You really shouldn’t be busting out the scarves until November, if that. If you want winter to come that soon, then you should move to Alaska.

Also, please don’t wear a scarf that can complete wrap around your entire body or cover all of your head. You look ridiculous and deserve to be shunned…and possibly get stones thrown at you. You just need one to cover your ears, nose, and mouth. Get a hat, not a ski mask, if you want to protect your head. Please wear appropriate clothing when you bust out the scarf. You can’t rock the scarf while wearing shorts or a tank top. It’s rather idiotic. Being caught wearing a scarf inappropriately will get you 15 to life in prison.

I hope this helps you a little bit with figuring out what not to wearing during the fall. If you have any fashion’s that I missed, feel free to drop me a line.

Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more fashion advice.