‘Animal Crossing: New Horizons’ explained

It’s been about a couple of months since we left normalcy. During that time, a video game character has been allowing us to enjoy life and stealing money from us. The worst part about it? It’s not even real money. Today, we are going to talk about the Nintendo Switch video game “Animal Crossing: New Horizons.” Welcome to “Pop Project Explains.”

“Animal Crossing: New Horizons” is the fifth title in the life simulation series. It’s like the popular game “The Sims” but with animals. I’m not going to dive into the details and explain the franchise more than that. For this edition of “Pop Project Explains,” I’ll be explaining what the hell is going on in the new game.

So “Animal Crossing: New Horizons” follows world-renowned business owner Tom Nook, a raccoon who gets you to come to his private island to start a new life for free. With his help of “helpers,” Timmy and Tommy, you travel and set up camp in the middle of nowhere. Wondering if you are going to die at the hands of three anthropomorphic raccoons, you get forced to make friends with your fellow islanders before you are appointed head of the island without any say. You become Tom Nook’s bitch.

My letter to my residents

Tom has recruit people to your island by having you spent money that you don’t have on it. What do the other islanders contribute? Jack shit because they are animals. Tom pretty much put you to work right away and pays you less than the minimum for too much work. Again, you are his bitch. He pays for fishing, bugs you catch, weeding you pull from the island, etc. What does Mr. Nook do? Jack shit because he’s an animal. Sitting around doing nothing is a lot of hard work. She will tell you things and then tell you the complete opposite. I don’t know if she took too many shots in the head from “Super Smash Brothers Ultimate,” but she needs to get it together. She isn’t helpful.

You need to watch your back when it comes to Tom Nook. I’m pretty sure that he’s in some sort of gang or something like that. There’s just something sketchy about that raccoon, especially with those two little raccoons. They talk in unison and run the island store. Tom Nook is running a monopoly. He has all in hand in the cookie jar of “Animal Crossing.” He is the Donald Trump in Raccoon.

The game is fun, but there’s a lot of things that we need to be explained to understand what the hell is going on entirely. Pretty much, we need free press in “Animal Crossing” so we can expose Tom Nook and his criminal activities. Honestly, I would love to know the backstory of Mr. Nook and his gang empire. We need to know the truth! I hope this explains what “Animal Crossing: New Horizons” is.

Leave your thoughts/tea in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more of that tea.

Pop Project Explains: Tiger King

Hey, all you cool cats and kittens, I thought it was the time during this quarantine life to talk about the Netflix phenomenon that has taken the world by storm. Unless your quarantine lockdown spot is under a rock or Jared Leto on a 12-day retreat in the desert, Tiger King, or “Tiger King: Murder, Mayhem, and Madness” is an eight-episode true-crime documentary about the Joe Exotic and his life that matches just as crazy of a name. So without further ado, welcome to Pop Project Explains Tiger King.

I’m Never Going To Financially Recover From This

DISCLAIMER: All the info and jokes are based on the information presented in the series. I’m going off of what was shown and told in the show.

“Tiger King” follows Joe Exotic, a gun wheeling polygamist gay man with a taste for “turning” straight men gay, horrible fashion, and of course, tigers. He is in a blood feud with a Carole Baskins. She’s an animal activist with a non-profit animal sanctuary that may or may not have fed her husband to her tigers. Both of them have Tigers and will do anything to protect them. Unironically, both probably would be best friends. Joe is gay, and that looks like to be Carole’s people.

Left to Right: Carole Baskins, Joe Exotic. Don’t they look like they would be BFFs?

Both Joe and Carole seemly run zoos for the public to come in, and they can interact with the animals. Well, Carole technically runs a “sanctuary,” but that’s the fancy way she’s running a zoo. There’s also a third character in this show, but they are going to get their own paragraph because he’s bat shit crazy. Joe and Carole used their “following” to attack each other. One would use her Facebook, and the other would use his “popular” online talk show and singing career. You read that right; Joe had a singing career. He even wrote a diss track for Miss Carole called “Here Kitty Kitty.” These two are the reason why we have tacky and not nice things.

“Allegedly,” Joe Exotic hired a hitman to kill Carole Baskin for him. He ended up getting caught and going to jail, where he currently resides. The constant threats on video didn’t help his case. If there’s a positive message to this shitshow, it’s that you need to watch what you put out on the internet. It will be there forever, especially if it contains you telling your followers to give out death threats or something like putting dead animals in their mailbox.

Now it’s time for the shadiest person on the show

This is Doc Antle. He has really long hair. Apparently people want to screw him. Not sure why.

Now there’s another character in this “wonderful show,” and his name is Mahamayavi Bhagavan Antle or Doc Antle. Just by that name, you can tell that he’s going an interesting character. Some consider him to be the real villain of “Tiger King.” I don’t, the villain of “Tiger King” is karma and their stupidity. Let’s be real, which most of this was sensationalized for ratings. Some of this shit is too good to come from the minds

Doc Antle runs T.I.G.E.R.S or The Institute for Greatly Endangered and Rare Species. T.I.G.E.R.S is allegedly a sex cult that worships Doc Antle and Tigers. According to one of his former ladies, he gave her a new name and made her one of his “apprentices.” To move up in her apprenticeship, she was given the feeling that she would need to jump his bones. She was even told to get breast implants. I don’t know about you, but I don’t know how does getting breast implants is helping Tigers. Allegedly the park likes to showcase the women to the families that come in it. I wonder if the Tiger dens also doubled as sex dungeons.

There were even employees who were impressed with how he trained both the tigers and his “women.” Ew. He dates a bunch of his employees. He also allegedly put down countless tigers for no reason. Doc Antle is just a trip. The kind of trip you don’t want to go on but end up going on. He’s sketchy. Frankly, everyone featured on this show is sketchy.

There’s some other stuff in the show like someone getting their arm ripped off, deaths, and FOOTAGE OF SOMEONE SHOOTING THEMSELVES IN THE HEAD. Yeah, there’s actual security camera footage of someone shooting themselves in the head. While you don’t see gore of it, it leaves little to the imagination. There are also some heartwarming moments but let’s be real, we aren’t here for heartwarming but rather the drama.

Final thoughts

“Tiger King” is pretty much like a train wreck that you just cannot help with but watch. I ended up binging one long boring night. Didn’t get anything out of besides the fact that everyone in the show was bat shit crazy. I wouldn’t recommend watching this because I think I lost brain cells. You just start viewing it, and then the next thing you know, you’re on the last episode.

There is a new episode that is kind of like a reunion show with some of the people. It’s pretty much Joe McHale, former host of “The Soup” on E!, making fun of them. It was okay fun. You will probably end up watching it just because it’s there. They are looking to make this into a series with Nicholas Cage starring as Joe Exotic. Best casting decision ever.

Leave your thoughts/tea in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more of that tea.

Pop Project Explains: Cady Herron was the villain in ‘Mean Girls’

That’s so fetch

Yesterday was the 14th anniversary of the release of the most iconic movie, “Mean Girls.” If you have not seen this movie, then I’m deeply sorry for you. This movie will change your life. I thought that I would explain the movie in honor of the release of this movie. It was during my research that I discovered something more chilling and true. I was upset that I didn’t notice it earlier. Welcome to the latest edition of “Pop Project Explains.” This is where I explain things.

In the movie, Lindsay Lohan stars as Cady Herron. Cady is supposed to be the protagonist of the film because she is the main character/narrator of the film. But in all actuality, she’s really the villain of the film. You read that correctly. Now before you click off of this, I’m not saying that Regina George is a saint. She is far from it. But let’s look at the bigger picture here.

Cady Herron, with the help of Janis and Damien, was systematically destroying Regina’s life. They broke up Aaron Samuels and Regina, made The Plastics turn again her, and they even made gain weight so she would lose her “bitchin’ bod.” Then once they got did ruin her life, Cady pretty much just swooped in and stole Regina’s life and gained control of The Plastics. She cast aside her relationship with Janis and Damien once she was done with their help. This is just icing on the cake our so-called “protagonist.”

Cady Herron lied and used people. Granted, Regina did the same thing to a certain degree. But Regina just did to get her way to the top. Cady just did it for revenge. Regina did something selfish and Cady wanted to ruin her life over something small. Cady sought out to ruin and destroy Regina’s world.

Please explain to me how we should be rooting for Cady. She doesn’t seem like the person that I would root. I’d honestly rather root for Regina George if I had to pick the worst of two evils. “Mean Girls” is really about two evil and manipulative girls trying to out-bitch each other. The one we aren’t supposed to like is the victim. Regina George victimized people but not to the extent of Cady Herron. Both did repent their ways at the end but as JoJo said, “It’s just a little too late.”

I hope that I just ruined “Mean Girls” for you because my love for the movie is scarred for life. Granted, I’ll still watch it because it’s the best movie of all time. But I will be cussing out Cady more than Regina.

Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more cool things.

Pop Project Explains: ‘Glee’ and how ridiculous it was

Glee-sm

Don’t Stop Believin’…I didn’t know what else to put here

With the new show “Rise” bringing back a television show that focuses on musical theater, I thought it was time to reminisce and talk about the OG show.  No, I’m not going to discuss “Fame” because frankly, the only good part of “Fame” was the 1980 movie that starts it all. We are going to discuss “Glee,” or as I will be calling it “The Lea Michele Show.” Welcome to another edition of “Pop Project Explains.”

CLICK HERE TO READ MORE “POP PROJECT EXPLAINS”

If you are new to how “Pop Project Explains” works, I pretty much just tell it like it is. I honestly look at something and just make fun of the ridiculous that it is. Click the link above to read more about them. If you are looking for my past “Glee” articles, click here because I did a lot of them. So let’s dive into it now.

What is Glee?

“Glee” follows an overly pushy Jewish girl with two gay dads named Rachel Berry, played by Lea Michele. She has big dreams and is a borderline sociopath While she does get better and more likable as the show goes on, it’s all about her and what she wants. She steals the head cheerleaders boyfriend, only helps people in order for her to shine, sends a girl to a crack house because she’s worried about getting the spotlight over her; the list just goes on.

“Glee” takes place at William McKinley High School in Lima, Ohio. Apparently, no one on the show has ever been to Ohio because I’ve never seen a show less like Ohio. Like they have outdoor hallways and lunchrooms. How does a school have outdoor hallways when the weather is unpredictable like Cardi B? Also, how does a Ohio public school afford this?

The show is pretty much just built around Rachel. There’s plenty of other character but they just there. Sure, sometimes they get the time to shine but it’s not as much as Rachel. They even point this out repeatedly through the series but nothing happens about it. And the best part is that the teachers just let it happen. Sure, Rachel is extremely talented but let others shine. Even after she graduated it was still all about her.

The true stars of the show were the McKinley High Jazz Band and their Pianist. They must be a bunch of musical geniuses because they could play any sort of song or genre at a drop of a dime. They would literally just walk up to the front of the classroom and then start singing. The band just knew what song to play. Why are they wasting their talents on playing for a show choir?

For the majority of “Glee” existence, they complained about the budget they had but yet they did overly beautifully produce numbers that they never performed at any of the competitions. They did a mashup of the theme from “Singin’ in the Rain” and Rihanna’s “Umbrella.” It was full on raining on stage while they were performing. How can you not afford buses to sectionals? Also, where is the school board stepping in to look at this? There so much more money going toward useless performances that could have gone towards something else. 

I hope this helped explain “Glee” more to you. I also hope you realize how ridiculous this show was. Good show, just a bit too much. If you haven’t seen “Glee,” I highly recommend it.

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