The positive review of Britney Spears’ ill-fated ‘Britney Jean’

In the sake of being more positive, I thought about trying to pick the Top 5ive songs off of crappy and not very good albums. Boy, that was a pain in the butt. It was like trying to the best redeeming qualities of an orange loudmouth who may or may not being homophobic, racist, and appear to be very sticky. So I decided to it might be better just to talk about the positive things about it instead. What a better way to do it then with the album that all Britney Spears fans hate, “Britney Jean.”


Sorry Leslie Knope, but this isn’t a trap. How this is going to work is that I’m going to talk positively about the album without mentioning the singles. So “Work Bitch” and “Perfume” won’t be mentioned at all. It’s like the never existed, what we all wish would happen with this album. If I do a good job, then I’ll allow myself one paragraph to bitch and moan about this album.

There are two types of People in the world…

“Britney Jean” is a good experimental album for Britney Spears. It’s an album that is unlike any of her previous works before. None of her previous stuff sounds like this. There’s a decent amount of songs that rather good club bangers. “Till It’s Gone,” “Body Ache,” and “Tik Tik Boom” have catchy beats and you can really jam out to it. 

Britney Spears performing at “Britney: Piece of Me” in 2013

Britney also brings up her game as she features a lot of big names on the album. Her sister Jamie Lynn Spears, T.I., and are featuring on songs that will make you shake. It’s rather refreshing to see Britney interact with other artists on her album. Before “Glory,” She really hasn’t other artist featured in her song since her 2004 album “In The Zone.”

If you don’t want to hear my actual thoughts then I would just skip the following paragraph. I earned my paragraph to bitch and moan about “Britney Jean.” This is the hardest thing I had to do. Even if some of it is sarcasm. So without further ado, here’s a paragraph of my thoughts on “Britney Jean:”

While I think “Work Bitch” is the highlight of the album, “Britney Jean” is just positively her worst album ever. I truly believe that “Lohan Holiday” is a better album just because it had a single and consistent theme to it. “Britney Jean” was all over the place and didn’t sound like Britney at all. If this bitch could hit the high note in “Passenger” all this time, then just give her all the Grammys. Don’t get me started on the songs she did with and her sister. I could go on and on about how horrible they are. They ruined my soul listening to them.

I hope you enjoyed my positive only review of “Britney Jean.” I hurt every fiber of my soul to write this. I’m very glad that Britney took the time to make something. Next positive review will hopefully be a little bit easier. 

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The Britney Jean Experience


Another year has almost passed and it’s time that we, as group, discuss a subject that we have avoided because we weren’t ready to discuss–Britney Jean. I know what you are thinking and yes, this is finally a review of it. It time that we accept it into our lives and accept it for what it turned out to be for our queen–a flop.

“Britney Jean” isn’t a bad album, but it’s not a good one either. There is actually a lot of songs that I liked off of it. One of my biggest complaint about it is that there is a lack of direction to the album. There isn’t any sort of genre of music but rather a mixture of genre. This would be fine if the genres made sense together. It literally seems like they recorded a bunch of song and just put all the ones that Britney had a personal connection with. The songs weren’t organized well to make it flow right. I feel like they just stuck all the songs in iTunes and hit shuffle. Let’s be real and say it together now–the album was rushed. The rushed it like was a prom night fling.

I’ll be nice and not blame on it but then again he gave a rather bad song that he and Brit did on the album that wasn’t no “Scream and Shout” nor “Big Fat Bass.” The song was bad.  There was a lot of producers on this album, so much that you might have noticed that I had to bold a lot to get across that there was way more than I believe their should be. And was the one of the only consistent ones, hence why he gets the heat.

Britney didn’t even promote the album besides on social media. It’s like she pretty much said “Hey y’all, I made this album. It’s a very personal album but not personal enough for me to promote it!” Yeah, she would actually do the same for her single with Iggy Iggs that turned out to flop.

Overall, “Britney Jean” was the personal album that was too rushed to be anything. It’s not as personal as “Blackout,” that album is pretty much the best album she ever did and this was around the time she shaved her head.  Buy it if you are a Britney fan, but if you aren’t then just listen to it.


Rating: 3.5 Bitches that need to work out of 5


Due to the lawsuit with Spotify, we won’t be posting a streaming link to the album until it’s cleared up. Here’s the link for the Apple Music stream

Have an opinion of “Britney Jean?” Let us know in the comments below.