Big Brother 19: Mid-Season Breakdown

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Showmances. Friendship. Gold diggers. We’ve just hit the midseason mark and this season makes me want to shove my head into a stove. “Big Brother 19” is making season 9 look like a good season and the racist cast of season 15 look slightly more likable. Unlike my weekly recaps, this is my overall review/rankings of what I’m calling one of the worst played seasons of BBUS.

CLICK HERE FOR ALL THE SHADE AND TEA IN BIG BROTHER 19

My thoughts watching this season

Let’s get into the major issue with this season: This house is a bunch of idiots and jackasses. Paul walked into the house and has literally controlled all of them besides Cody and Jessica. I don’t hate Paul for the game that he is playing but I hate the house is just letting him literally control their game. It’s to the point where they just literally being his dogs and when he says bark, they bark. The breaking point for me was when Matt was nominated on the block and then used it on someone else just to get Cody out. Like WTF? Why wouldn’t you use it on yourself when you are on the block? I really hope that someone votes to evict Matt for the sheer purpose of freaking him the fuck out. It’s just so frustrating because they aren’t playing for themselves. They are playing to advance themselves but more so Paul. They are all sheep and it’s literally ruining the season. They all are just playing for jury and that’s it.

It’s just so frustrating because they aren’t playing for themselves. They are playing to advance themselves but more so Paul. They are all sheep and it’s literally ruining the season. They all are just playing for jury as well. It’s like once they reach jury, they have hit the holy grail. You really just want to smack them all in the face and make them realize that while making it to jury is good, actually winning the game would be better. You really just want to smack them all in the face, they are all playing horribly.

And you can’t talk about them playing horribly without talking about how horrible they have been to each other in this house. One houseguest walked because of it but that was just the start of it. WE HAD AN ENTIRE HOUSE VS TWO MOB SCENE BECAUSE PAUL TOLD THEM TO DO IT AND TO “DON’T LET THEM GET THEIR SANITY.” This lasted for hours and was the start of it because from there they also attacked Cody’s military service. While this is all going on, Paul is just egging them all. Doing this made them look like trash. Cody and Jessica aren’t also out of the clear for this behavior either but their crap doesn’t look as bad compared to the shit the rest of the house did.

At this point in the game, Paul will be either final three or final two. As much as I would

If only people found this entertaining

like to have him gone during the Double Eviction, I know that isn’t going to happen. Paul has them wrapped around his finger and they are not in a hurry to evict them. While it appears Cody and Jessica have made Mark and Elena woke, it’s still not going happen. It’s suicide for them to try to take out Paul, especially when everyone one they are going to talk to is just going to tell the overload of friendship. If there was more than one returning playing in this season, then Paul wouldn’t be in the position that he is in as well. It probably would have Paul’s side vs the other side, which sounds way more entertaining than Paul’s side, who I call “The Friend-sheep,” vs Cody and Jessica. The fact that there was only one vet is the what is hurting the show. It worked for “Big Brother: Over the Top” because they didn’t give Jason so much power, to begin with. Also, Jason wasn’t an asshole. Paul is coming across as an ignorant asshole. I’m starting to think that Victor was the reason why Paul was so likable last season. This season isn’t doing any favors for Paul in the whole “fan favorite” department. Actually, his whole side is extremely unlikeable.

 

Pretty much my go to reaction for anything these idiots do anymore

“Big Brother 19” has fallen from grace. Week one was probably the best weeks in BBUS history but it’s now a dumpster fire train wreck with only Kevin and slightly Mark being the last likable ones in the house when Cody is sent to Jury. The only thing that could save this season is Paul going home during the Double Eviction. If they actually get rid of him, then it will be a whole new game. But with these jackasses, that won’t happen. If Paul does go to Final 2 again, I don’t see him winning. Also, he really doesn’t deserve to be in the same category as BB10 winner and BB14 runner-up Dan Gheesling. For those that don’t know, Dan is the only person in North American Big Brother history to make it final two during both of the times he competed on the show, something that not even Dr. Will could accomplish. Paul isn’t in the same category as Dan and never should be. At this point, I want Paul and Raven to go to Final two just so Paul can know he lost to Raven. There’s not really anyone that I want to see in final two. I’d be slightly okay if Mark was there but other than that, I’m pretty much over this season.

 

On the more positive side of things, we are almost done with this season and it’s time for “The Friend-Sheep” to start eating each other alive. They already got their marching orders from Overload Friendship. sigh. I cannot wait for Big Brother Canada to start back up. At least with Canada, you don’t want to constantly ram your head up against the wall, through a door, and then drink two gallons of bleach in order to make it watchable.

Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more BB19 shade and tea.

 

 

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Top 5ive: Big Brother seasons you need to watch

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While we are the midst a summer of temptations with Big Brother 19, there's a lot of down time if you are following the live feeds. So I say, don't use that opportunity let your family know you're still alive and grace them with your presences. Re-watch past Big Brother seasons!

Re-watching past seasons is such an easy thing to do, especially if you have CBS All Access (I'm going to assume you do if you are watching the Live feeds). It lets you see how the game evolved and also helps you keep up on all of the references. Here's a list of seasons that I recommend watching if you don't want to go season by season.

5. Big Brother 2

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It's the first season with the format that we know and love. The first season followed the international version of the game, which is actually rather boring to point. While I do recommend watching the first couple of episodes of the first season just to see what it was, Big Brother 2 is just too good. It gave us Dr. Will Kirby, who would go on to become one of the best players in the history of the game, as well as ChillTown, one of the greatest alliances in Big Brother North American history. It's a really great to see how far we came since then.

4. Big Brother 10

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After the disaster that was Big Brother 9, Big Brother 10 was a back to basic season that returned to strangers entering the house and having little to minimal twist. This season was all up the houseguest being entertaining and boy, they were. You know you are going to have a great season when you hear an 71-year-old man compare a 24-year-old man to Judas, which is still an iconic line that will live on. This season introduced use to Big Brother Legends Dan Gheesling, who won this season, and Jesse Godderz, who we've seen more time during the last couple of season of Big Brother than anyone would want to see. Anyways, this season is just a great season from a cast perspective.

3. Big Brother 8

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This season is only notable for the winner and the runner-up: Evel Dick and Daniele Donato. They started the game not knowing they would end up playing together and having big targets on their back, to literally making it to the end. The father and daughter  team was estranged before entering the house and the game brought them together. Evel Dick was literally the most entertaining person in the house that season. He terrorized the houseguest and then Daniele would go smooth things over with them. At one point, Dick and Daniele was on the block. Dick won the veto and used on Daniele and got the alliance to turn on the their pawn. I miss those days.sigh.

2. Big Brother 7 aka Big Brother All-Stars

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It was the best of the best competing from the first six seasons of the show. It was great and amazing. It will probably be the only all-star season we get but it will go down infamy. It gave many of our favorite players to come back into the game and try their hand at it again. It was great season with a lot of strategy and backstabbing. It also was the first to feature Big Brother Slop. Before this, they would force the houseguest to eat Peanut Butter and Jelly.

1. Big Brother 6

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The single best season in the history of Big Brother USA. Hands down. It was the most entertaining and chaotic. It has the longest competition in North American Big Brother history. It also spawned iconic lines and moments as well as legends. It was kind of reboot of the game as it was a brand new house. It also gave us the iconic theme song that we hear every week, or everyday on the live feeds. Big Brother 6 was a house divided with bitter tensions and fierce competition that  made for good television and live feeds. I cannot tell you how good this season was.

Honorable Mention: Big Brother: Over the Top

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The first internet season of Big Brother in the world, it's something you just need to check out. It's only 10 episodes long and features a lot of drama, twists, and Julie Chen saying Shit. Just hearing Julie Chen say shit is reason enough to watch the season. While It was way more entertaining live, mainly because you literally saw everything, it's still a great season that kept everything interesting and divided people just as much as the presidential election that happened at the same time.

Honorable Mention: Big Brother 14

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This season is only on this list because for two reasons: Dan Gheesling and Wil Heuser. Wil didn't make it far on the show but he has been giving amazing parodies of the every Big Brother USA season since which have been way better than the actual season. During his time on the show, his Diary Room sessions were hilarious and he was just an entertaining houseguest. You need to also watch for Dan Gheesling and the amazing game he played. He already won the game but then re-entered to coach a team of new houseguest. It wasn't until a few weeks into the game that we re-entered the game as a houseguest. He played a flawless game and really should have won the game for a second time. The only reason he didn't win was for the fact that the jury was bitter because he literally screwed them all out of the house.

Honorable Mention: Big Brother Canada

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Our neighbors to the north have their own version of Big Brother and it's literally better than the last few years of Big Brother USA. It's the same format that we know and love but done it way that makes it fresh and just better. There's plenty of ways you can watch past seasons if you don't live in Canada online. If you are going to watch Big Brother Canada, then I recommend all of them with Big Brother 5 as the strongest and best so far. All of them a good (Big Brother 3 is a clusterfuck) with a lot of iconic moments. If you thought that Big Brother USA was petty, Big Brother Canada is the pettiest of them all.

Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more Big Brother things you never knew you needed. 

Big Brother Battle Back Showdown rocks the house

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It’s time for the now annual Battle Back competition. It’s the time were evicted houseguest competes in order to re-enter the game and continue their dreams toward the grand prize. And this time, the Battle Back was literally everything.

Now I won’t do a play-by-play of it because frankly, that is pointless. This Battle Back was more thought out and do extremely well. I applaud them for making something that was literally just ehh the first time they did it and just making what it was. It also could be the fact that this cast is probably the best cast they have had in years as a whole. This so far is the best season that the United States has put on in years. Probably since Big Brother 14 or Big Brother 10.

So they did a playoff format for this year’s Battle Back. The first four evicted competed with the winner and the one that came in second moving onto the next round. Then those two competed with the winner going on to face an existing houseguest to see if they could re-enter the game. If the evicted houseguest won, then they were back in the house. But if the existing houseguest won, then the evicted houseguest would go home.

Here’s the breakdown of what happened because I’m not Julie Chen and obviously not good at explaining rules, as you can see from above:

  • Cameron and Cody beat Dominique and Jillian
  • Cody beat Cameron
  • Paul was voted by the house 11-1 to face Cody.
  • Cody beat Paul

Pretty much Mark during all of this.

Personally, I’m excited Cody to re-enter the game because that means there will be more interesting television and feed. When the houseguests found out about the Battle Back Showdown, all of them were dreading the return on Cody. Mark looked like someone kicked his puppy when he thought about the return of Cody and Dominique. Jessica thought was ecstatic to see her boyfriend return. It also helped the fact that she could prevent them from evicted him/her. Like, we all saw this coming from miles away. This is why you don’t burn bridges with the evicted houseguests unless they walked from the game or you just flat-out can’t stand them. I thought of this as soon as Megan walked away from the game and they didn’t let Cameron re-enter the game right away.

 

Speaking of Cameron, he is probably kicking himself in the face when he re-watches the episodes and realizes how much he got screwed in the first episode and how close he was to vengeance before letting it all slip away. He was literally beating Cody for most of the competition until Cody realized what worked and won the comp. I hope Big Brother does a second chance season and Cameron is one of the “returning” houseguests so he can get a fair shake at the game.

 

Paul is running the game right now. 

The fact that the whole house picked Paul proves how much of a dangerous player in the game he is. I hope they go more into their reasoning for it because it just looks like everyone is his bitch and he’s a “puppet master.” He’s in a perfect position right now to win the game if they don’t get him out. Cody and Paul are going to be gunning for each other. The one left standing will have a very high chance of making it to the end. If it’s down to Cody/Paul and Kevin, then I see Kevin being the one to win it all. Hopefully, by then, Kevin doesn’t just float on by not knowing what is going on with his “mojos” and “HOV.” I honestly believe that he’s actually faking all of that. He’s a mastermind. Kevin and Paul are the big threats in the game. I say screw Cody and Jessica and focus on getting them out before it’s too late.

 

Now that week 3 is in the books. I cannot wait to see what happens next week with the return of Cody and what curse has been placed on the house when Jess accepted the temptation.

Leave your thoughts in the comment below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more BB19 crap.

 

Big Brother 19 recap: Week 2 & 3

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Originally I was going to recaps on all the shit that happened in the Big Brother house that week but it’s just too much going on. Instead, I’m just going to rant about what’s happening and my overall thoughts. It’s been a rather busy couple of weeks in the Big Brother house. Drama, fights, and tears. Let’s chat about it. THIS CONTAINS SPOILERS OF EVENT BEFORE BATTLEBACK.

Pretty much, Paul is like the newbie messiah and they are just falling him around like helpless sheep. There’s a few that aren’t but it’s pretty much the majority of the house. You think people would realize that large alliances don’t work in the game of Big Brother.  Like I’m pretty sure Paul’s side of the house has a final eight deal when most people make final five or four deals. I give them props for being realistic but I mean c’mon. Oh, and there’s already dissension in the rankings. I could have told you that one from the start.

These houseguests are like thirsty af. They many conversations a day about sex. The thirstiest of them all is Elena. Every time she’s on the live feeds, it seems to be talking about sex one way or anything. That girl has only one thing on her mind and that seems to be her showmance partner Mark’s penis. They have had multiple conversations and it’s now to the point where he also flashed it right in the middle of the backyard. It’s to the point now where I just want him to flash it so they can move on from talking about. And don’t call me thirsty now because we all know everyone looks forward to nudity of Big Brother one way or another. Nudity means interesting television.

Now that Cody is detached from her mouth, I kind of like Jessica. She’s actually not that bad. She’s rather funny. I think she will go farther in the game now that Cody is gone. The problem I had with her and Cody was the fact that they were constantly together and only interacting with other houseguests when it involved food. It was like they couldn’t go five feet from each other. But not that he is gone, she’s okay. If I had to pick my top five favorites, it would be Alex, Mark, Matt, Christmas, and Paul. Paul is only on there because he’s becoming more interesting this season than last season. I’ve also noticed that he’s using “Friendship” less often than he did last year. While I don’t want him anywhere near the final five, I do want him to go far because I’m enjoying the fact that he kept calling Nicole a snake last season and he’s now being referred to one now. He coming off as a total asshole though.

I was living for the fight between him and Dominque. Like Dom would have just laid low, she would have been fine somewhat but the paranoia got to her. While she was right on about Paul, she could have done it in a way that wouldn’t make people want to send you home. I was also living for her comments during the Veto meeting.  Like she wasn’t doing herself any favors. She was also speaking in tongues at one point. The paranoia has taken over and it blew up her game.

The final den of temptation allowed someone to halt an eviction and pretty much cancel it out. It was given to Jessica and I literally screamed with joy because it makes everything so much more enjoyable, especially if Cody reenter the house. I thought she was going to use it at the latest eviction but I’m glad she didn’t because Dominque needed to go. Dominque was evicted. It wasn’t a surprised and her speech was something that made no sense and just made her look fifty shades of cray.

I really want Josh to go home next. He’s just coming off as a whiny little brat that likes to throw fit when stuff doesn’t go his way. Like the fight he had with Mark in the backyard was over nothing and Mark walked away looking a little better than he does. They really need to take a swing at Paul and Kevin.  Both will be harder to get out as the numbers go down. Kevin is going to slide under the radar.

We’ll talk more once we know who once Battleback and HOH. I have a feeling that they will be combining the two or having both play out and giving the Battleback winner immunity for the first week back. Hopefully Cody will win because it will make for interesting TV and live feed.

Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more BB19 tea.