All Hail Oprah

 

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Bow down to the Queen Oprah Winfrey! On you knees, Peasants!

This is literally the day that I have waited for years. I’m literally so excited for this-mainly because I can finally make jokes about this. Oprah freaking’ Winfrey, is considering running for president in 2020. Let’s all take a breath about this because this is like Christmas. Here’s a gif to explain my excitement:

So the Supreme Ruler of the world, Oprah Winfrey, has been told that she should run for president literally for years. One can understand why she wouldn’t because she has a lot on her plate. She owns the world through her propaganda channel known as OWN-the title makes so much more sense now, doesn’t it?  Anyways, The Supreme Ruler said in an interview that Donald Trump’s presidency has made her realize that she doesn’t need experience. Oh I how love when Oprah spills the tea.

This is literally the best news ever because she would be the best president. Can you picture how much better the country will be when she does a Presidential favorite things? While it’s not as good as my favorite things,I gave away six packs abs and attractive celebrities, it will literally shake the nation. Can you picture her giving away millions of things?

She also has an army of highly trained girls in her school for Africa. Oprah has her own little army of assassins. I bet you are now sticking two and two together and it’s all making sense. Oprah has a lot of power due to her reach. She freaking help Obama secure his win. She literally has all the power of  the world. No one really fears her…at least they are willing to admit it. Rumor has it that people who pissed off Oprah, never lived to tell about it again. Oprah is one not to mess with,

Her cabinet will be the best. Gayle will be the first lady..erm, I mean Press Secretary. Martha Stewart can be in there. Hell, Barry Obama might be in the cabinet too. It could be an all-star cabinet. People will be wanting to have her to have more than two terms. And besides, who hates Oprah? Sure, she might have killed them all but still, no one really has a bad thing to say about her.

I’m personally all for Oprah’s candidacy for President. Sorry Paris, but Oprah will be a better choice. Oprah for Supreme Ruler of the US in 2020.

Like this article if you want Oprah to run for President. Make sure you leave a comment below with your thoughts. Make sure you follow me on Twitter and follow the blog, the button is down below.

 

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Pop Project’s Favorite Things 2016

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It’s time for the holiday tradition that has Oprah looking at me like “WTF?” Look out Oprah, you’re list doesn’t have anything on mine. It’s time for the list that keeps on giving and for you to take look underneath whatever you are standing/sitting on because it’s time for POP PPRRRRROJECT FAAAVVORITE THHHINNNNGGGGSS!!! Make sure you read that in a Oprah style of yelling. This should be you now:

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So this list is some of the things that I love this year. It’s kind of look back at the year that was 2016.  So here are my favorite things of 2016. Buckle up, Oprah and Gayle, I’m about to take you to school:

ABS

2016 was the year of abs and everyone loved it. 2 pack, 6 pack, 8 pack, or 12 pack. There were abs everywhere you turned. Abs on guys, abs on girls, abs on animals, abs on trees, abs everywhere. It was like an ab heaven.  It was GLORIOUS! If you didn’t have abs then you wanted them. Let’s be real-having abs are like very sexy. People literally throw their underwear at abs. They brought all the people to the yard. Abs are a status that you work out and you can have water fall on them and make a waterfall. Who doesn’t a nice waterfall?

I could go on and on about how wonderful they are to look at and who has the single best abs to stare at. But we have a lot of other things to discuss and go over on this list. But abs were definitely out in full force this year and it was magically delicious for the eyes. I know, get the hose out because there is one of this to come. So yes, there are a pair of abs there for you. It’s a two pack of men’s abs and women’s abs because I don’t judge. Also copies of “Magic Mike” and “Magic Mike XL” will be available if you already have a pair of abs.

 

Adorable animals

There were so many adorable animals posted on the internet this year that it was only fitting that we including them in the list
because they are so cute. You could be having a bad day and then you see one of those adorable animals and the next thing you know you are saying “aww” because they are sweet and cute. You just want to get your hands on one. They are wonderful stress reliever and are good for soul because adorable animals just make everyone feel better. And they just look into your soul with their adorable eyes.

Under you, is a bucketful of adorable animals, some of which are adorable and deadly. If there isn’t an animals under you, then you better run quickly because they escaped and you only have a limit amount of time because the deadly ones strike. But hey, we’re stupid enough to touch it because if they are cute enough, it would harm/kill me!

 

Nostalgia city

This year was the year of nostalgia where all of our childhood memories continued on in an excess amount of reboots because 2016 was the year people milked everything for that green dough. We had the Fuller House reboot, Gilmore Girls 4 part series, Legends of the Hidden Temple movie, and so many more. It’s like someone when through our diary and decided to make all of our dreams come true no matter how much of a bad idea it is. Let’s be real-some of the reboots are stupid and never needed to happen.

For reading this article today, I got you a copy of the unreleased prequel to Mariah Carey’s “hit” movie “Glitter.” It’s called “Showgirls.” You can thank me all later.

 

Zayn

Can I just say that once ZAYN left One Direction, he got more likable? This year has been his year and let me tell you-he has a dirty side that makes Xtina want to take a bath. His song “PILLOWTALK” was extremely catchy like the STD the people got when they had one night stands to it. His album was lit and strange all at the same time. The most disturbing part of the album was how the tracklist was listed for each song. It WaS lITTErAlLy Likke THIS aNd mADe me WONder If THiS wAS COdE. Who has their trackless spelt like that? A Visionary that’s who.

Everyone in the “studio” audience will receive a copy of “Mind of Mine” as well a Pillow Pet version of ZAYN. Enjoy the album as you cuddle up with a tattooed pillow pet.

 

Celebrities on Social Media

Celebrities on social media were too much this year. They had no chill like at all. Their favorite thing to do this year was to go on what I call temper tantrum. They would get all pissy and then tweet/insta/post a status about how they are “done” with social media. Then five minutes later, they would be back on there like it never happened. I get that we have short attention spans these days but we aren’t freaking dumb. Just grow a pair and move on with whatever shiz is going on social media. Move on and get over it.

Under everyone is a signed copy of infamous celebrities tweets. It’s a brand new book published by yours truly. You’re welcome for the table book full of profanity and accidentally nude tweets. It’s fun for the all ages.

Hairspray Live!

This was everything and it was amazing. Sure, it had its problems but it was literally everything that we all wanted from it. From
the soundtrack to the actually performance. From Ariana Grande and Jennifer Hudson’s duet, to

Everyone is going home with a copy of “Hairspray 2: King Cobra.” It’s the sequel movie about Link Larkin, played by Garrett Clayton, getting his big break…..in the gay porn industry. Watch him go from the Corny Collins show to starring in movies such as “You Can’t Stop the Meat,” “Good Morning, Balty Whore,” “Big, Blonde, and Beautiful,” and the classic “Legend of Mr. Balty Whore’s Crabs.”

 

Shawn Mendes

This was this dudes year. Shawn Mendes was everywhere this year. He literally played all the talk shows and even did SNL. He even managed to become the Nick Jonas of 2016 with all the pictures of his abs that made worried parents/significant others have to hose down their children/partners because they all were thirsty af. And yes, he is of legal age in the United States.

Everyone is going home with a copy of Shawn Mendes’ newest album, as well as a signed picture of his abs for all the fangirls and fanguys that freaked out over his latest magazine spread.  You’re welcome.

 

Britney Spears

It’s Britney, bitch. I don’t need to say why she’s on here. It’s unhealthy for her not to be. Everyone will go home with a copy of her new album, as well as a yellow umbrella.

 

 

These are our Favorite things in 2016. I hope you enjoy all the gifts that I gave you. You are welcome. And Oprah, call me next year and I’ll help you do your list next year.

 

What’s some of your favorite things? Let us know in the comments below or tweet @Steven_Kaufman using #PopProject and #FavoriteThings.

Taylor Swift is the new Oprah

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So it was announced that Taylor Swift, the teeny-bobbing-maneating singer/songwriter/siren, is getting her own channel on the AT&T’s newest streaming television service called “DirecTV Now.”

Literally, all the channel will have is behind-the-scenes footage, performances, videos, and other things that you can just find on the already free streaming service known as “YouTube.” And if it’s not already on “YouTube,” it will be as soon as it airs on the Channel. Packages will start as “low” as $35/month and can go up to $75/month.

Taylor Swift is literally become the new Oprah. Oprah launched the OWN, which is her just flat-out telling you that she will “OWN” you. It’s pretty much sounds like a “YouTube” channel. Except she’s “too famous” to have a “YouTube” channel that would probably end up getting her more money but hey, that would be common sense. Taylor doesn’t seem to have much of that because she keeps on co-workers and writing songs about them breaking her heart. Or she could just be into that shiz #kinkylove #nojudgement. Either way, she’s bluntly say that she’s too good for a YouTube channel.  There’s also going to be a turf war happening as Winfrey v Swift is going down like it did in the Bad Blood video.

Will T-Swift’s squad be able to take out Gayle and the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls? You better be crazy if you didn’t think that school was there because she actually wanted to help. She training them for her global takeover and for an occasion like this. Have you also noticed that there isn’t any like personal pictures of Oprah and Taylor? There’s just some interviews photos and some from O’s show and that’s it. It’s like they are already in a blood feud and no one noticed until this. Shots have been fired, Shots have been fired.

Have an opinion on this? Let us know in the comments below or tweet @Steven_Kaufman using #PopProject