Pop Project Investigates: Covfefe

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Here we go again. sigh.

Welcome to the first edition of “Pop Project Investigates.” It where I put on my investigative journalist hat in order to properly figure out what’s going on. Let’s talk about convfefe.

For those of you who don’t know, this is a tweet that Donald Trump sent out and then later delete:

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Many suspects that Trump just misspelled “coverage” due to his small hands but I believe that it’s actually a secret message that you need to decode. While Trump is known for his subtweeting, this isn’t one of his normal “This is fake news. I won the election. I’m awesome and you not” tweets. Don’t let him fool you because this is some secret hidden message.  Sure, it makes so much more sense to believe that “coverage” but that’s letting Trump win. I spent hours upon hours looking at the sentence structure and have come up with two theories on it.

Theory 1

Donald Trump used covfefe as a positive message to his supports. This one is probably less likely but it’s a theory because Trump hates using punctuation besides periods, which is very ironic. But let’s not get into this. Here’s how I think it should look like with punctuation:

Despite the constant negative press, covfefe!

Covfefe in use as something like “struggle on” or “power through.” It just to uplifted and tell everyone that it’s okay and everything is running smooth. I expect Donald Trump to continue on with the select messages with their true meanings leaking very soon because everything in the White House leaks lately. Secrets, the pipes, you name it and it has leaked there. Probably even the shower.

Theory 2

I’m pretty sure that the covfefe tweet was actually a text message to the Putin but Trump hit the wrong app on his phone. According to the Associated Press, Trump told world leaders to contact him on his personal number because that sounds like he’s not covering anything up. So Putin has his personal number and Trump was letting him know that everything was going to plan. Also, the tweet has no structure which fit well with the overall lack of structure in text messages in today’s society.

Covfefe is a term that is used to confirm that the plan is in place and it’s ready for the next phase. I believe that Covfefe is rather the plan name. It stands for

Confuse

Overturn

Victory

Falsify

Execute

Foreign

Exterminate

Covfefe is the overall plot to make sure Trump won the election. If you follow the outline of the plan’s name, we are currently on Falsify. We only have three phases left. Who knows what we will have in store in the other phases.

Covfefe isn’t something to be cherished but rather something to be worried about. Sure, we all hope it was a stupid mistake but what if that’s Trump wants you to believe that in order to hide the true nature of covfefe. Also, you know it’s a bad sign when your device doesn’t try to fix covfefe.

Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more sarcastic things. 

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Veronica Mars and the case of Donald Trump and the Russians

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Normally, I don’t like to get political on here but this shit is way too juicy not to discuss because it just keeps getting better and better. It’s so good at this point, everyone is thinking that this is a conspiracy/government cover-up. And since the lead investigator has been fired, I think it’s time to visit someone who could help America figure this out. Someone that doesn’t mind getting her hands dirty. It’s time to enlist the help of Veronica Mars.

So the Director of the FBI, James Comey, was fired yesterday and this just sent up a bunch of red flags. Comey was in charge of the investigation into the Russians involvement in the 2016 Presidential Election. I’m not going get into the investigation because we’ll be here all night. Literally, it’s a lot of info. The reason he was fired was because of the investigation into Hillary Clinton’s emails. This would end up contradicting everything Donald Trump’s campaign and supporters have said during and after his election. Like, who did they really think would believe that Donald Trump of all people would fire someone for the investigating Hillary’s emails? But hey, according to Kellyanne Conway, who has been found on CNN, these are just “alternative facts.” There’s a lot of conspiracy theories about this but I’m not going to mention them because I don’t want to disappear.

This has started what I’m calling “The Media War of 2017” because both parties are on the defense and taking to political shows to argue their parties points. The majority of one side just wants to push it under the rug because “fake news” is trying to turn the world against them. The other side wants to hire a special investigator to take over this case which will lead them to be “swimming with the fishes.” This is just literally insane because there’s a new twist or turn. It is kind of like this is a reality show. It’s like “The Apprentice” mixed in with “Survivor” and “Big Brother.” You don’t know what’s going to happen next which makes it’s slightly exciting from an entertainment point and fucking scary because it’s real life with big implications.

Because of this, I think it’s time for US government to hire Veronica Mars as the special investigate.Yes, I know what she’s a fictional character but this whole situation sounds like something off of “House of Cards.” Anyways, Veronica Mars would solve this case. She has a brilliant track history as a Private Investigator. She solved two murder cases before she turned 18 years old and got her license, she also has a law degree. She’s also been trapped inside an empty refrigerator as it was on fire, so there’s pretty much nothing that really scares her. Hiring Veronica would be the safest bet for finding out who will help figure out what’s going on. Mars will uncover the truth, especially if there is a cover up and it looks like there is one…allegedly.

Here’s to Veronica Mars saving us all with her skills and her sass:

Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for the sake of the world.

Another letter to President Trump

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Dear President Trump,

I hope this letter find you well and not on a golf course. I’m writing you this letter, again, because I feel like the first letter didn’t really click with you. So, we’re going to try this again and hope that maybe it will help. Let’s be honest, it’s probably won’t but I can try to think positively, right?

I’m just going to come out and say it: You really just need to stop. Do you really need to be such a dick on social media? Just because you don’t agree with things, that doesn’t mean that you have to be such a tool. You don’t really need to comment on every single news story that has your name on it. Just like you don’t need to push the same “story” to try to get people’s attention off of you. You’ve been in the public eye before, you should know what not to do. It’s also ironic that you are pushing this “oh, this is fake new! Don’t trust insert media outlet” and yet, you are the one causing most of the fake news story.

You also need to top throwing tempter tantrums on your social media when things don’t go your way. If life goes the way we wanted, then you wouldn’t be president. I’m sorry, that one was rather harsh. True but harsh. You just got to roll with the punches and move on. Calling people names and blaming others isn’t doing that. It’s rather the opposite, it’s like taking your ball and going home because Jimmy wouldn’t let you be team captain so you say “screw you, let me see you play with came without a ball.” Literally, that is what you are doing. Grow up and move on. It sucks but it’s what we all have to do.

Now, I’m not really sure if you are aware but people are supposed to like the President enough to trust him. Right now, you are very much failing at it like Reality television stars fail at staying relevant in the media after their show is over. Oops, was that too close to home? Anyways, by being a tool and a dick, that’s not getting people to like you. Whether you want to admit it or not, regardless it’s true, your ratings are the worst in history. You are still at a point where you can turn it around. It was will be very hard but you can do it. Just need to let someone else run your twitter and make your staff more likeable. Literally,  no one in your cabinet is likeable. Did you pick them to make yourself more likeable? Was it a “I have an idea and it will be HUUUGGGE! Make my cabinet less likeable that me and then people will be like ‘hey, Trump aint that bad!’?” If that was the plan, then it was a stupid plan.

I could sit here a literally just tell you all the things to make your cabinet needs to improve on but then we would literally be here all day. You have a country to run. All I am saying is that you need to be less of tool, let someone else run your social media, and attempt to make your cabinet more likeable and less like a bunch of assholes that America wants to punch in the face.

Also, Have you thought about making your presidency into a reality show? I all ready wrote up a treatment and it’s pretty much “The OC” meets “West Wing.” Let me know if you are interested, and we’ll see what we can work out.

Have a wonderful day, and please remember: don’t be a tool

Steven Kaufman

P.S. Please tell Putin and Russia I give my regards 😉

Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter because I’m awesome.

Lindsay Lohan:Social Justice Warrior

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Meet the newest American Social Justice Warrior, Lindsay Lohan. It’s was announced by Lindsay Lohan that she would like to meet with President Donald Trump and his Best Friend Vladimir Putin, the President of Russia, to discuss and solve the Syrian refugee crisis. Yes, you have read that right. I thought it was a joke. Literally, I thought this was “fake new.” There’s no way for this to be a real news story. But it is. Best. News Story.Ever.

Lindsay recently visited the United Nations to meet and discuss that Syrian refugee crisis. She just came from Turkey, where she was doing promotional work for a turkish company. While in Turkey, she visited with refugees and saw the issues going on there. She also gave gifts to the refugee children and won the hearts of the people of Turkey. Her visit to the U.N. was to discuss the issues of five country controlling the global policies.

It wasn’t until a Facebook Live interview with Daily Mail that she asked she wants to have a meeting with Trump and Putin, along with other hollywood celebrities in order to “broaden his ideas” about the crisis.

“I want to try to get the word out to Donald Trump bring him over there, have him see all the positive things they are doing over there and all America can do to help as well,”

Apparently, this cause is why Lindsay really haven’t been in the headlines recently. She’s been visiting Syrian refugees around the world and trying to help them. She visited an Istanbul hospital in September and even had a nightclub event in Greece, which all the proceeds when towards the cause.

While I’m very proud of Lindsay and the fact that she is using her fame to help people, can you picture that meeting between Lindsay, Trump, and Putin? To be a fly on the wall in that meeting. That literally seems like a sketch that Saturday Night Live would do. But could Lindsay be the one that could bring Trump around to let Refugees ins?

Sadly, I don’t see that happening, especially when you line up everything he was done so far against them in order to prevent them for entering the country. I could go on about this but I’m trying very hard to keep my politic views out of it. It’s very hard not to. I do think it would be in Trump’s best interest to actually meet with Lindsay about the matter because maybe it could help him see things more clearly when it comes to what’s really important. Hey, It might help him defeat the war against a Department store. Trump going with Lindsay Lohan to Turkey to see what they are doing, might actually help win over the countries that he was banned from entering the US.

 

Have an opinion on the matter, want to tell us you love us, or just want to say Howdy? Let us know in the comments below or tweet @Steven_Kaufman using #PopProject.