When Britney Spears was at a ‘Crossroads’

crossroads-sm

In honor of the 15th anniversary of the greatest movie ever, “Crossroads,” I felt like it was time to review that bitch. This movie is literally a very underrated movie. Sure, it sucked but so did “SpiceWorld.” “SpiceWorld” was a masterpiece for its time. We can all agree that it’s not as bad as “Glitter.” NOTHING.IS AS BAD.AS “GLITTER.”

Released on February 15th, 2002, “Crossroads” was written by the greatest mind of ABC, Shonda Rhimes. That is right, the person who brought you “Grey’s Anatomy,” “How to Get Away with Murder” (spoiler: don’t kill anyone), and “Scandal” wrote this movie. This movie’s plot is very predictable because it’s 2002 and we have to stick to what we know if we want to be cool. It’s follows three teenage girls that used to be friends but are no longer because….well, they just aren’t. The girls go on your standard cross-country road trip and end up finding themselves along the way, as well as become friends again. See how this is standard early 2000s movie?

The movie starts Britney Spears, who created the concept for the film, played the introverted smart girl named Lucy. Zoe Saldana, Uhura in the reboot “Star Trek” franchise, played the popular girl named Kit. Taryn Manning, Pennsatuckey in “Orange Is the New Black, played the knocked up trailer park outcast named Mimi. Can you just smell the early 2000s stereotypical characters?  It’s like they were trying to hard to fit in. Theirs other characters but they aren’t that important besides Britney’s love interest, who happens to be a bad boy. He’s just not a regular bad boy, but a brooding one. He also has musicial talents. But what girl doesn’t love them a brooding bad boy?

This movie isn’t good but it just screams nostalgia. Mainly for the soundtrack that is playing in the movie. The actual soundtrack is rather horrible. The only relevant person on it is Britney Spears. Bowling for Soup is on there but this was before “1985”. That is their only hit. It’s pretty much a big music video for Britney Spears. It even comes with crappy acting. Yes, Zoe and Tayrn’s acting isn’t the best. The most iconic scene is when Mimi falls don’t the steps. Literally, it’s the longest 20 seconds of your life. It’s like they really scrapping for that Oscar. Spoiler: It went to another movie. I do have to say that Britney’s acting was a rather good…that’s because most people thought it would be bad. You have to remember, that “Glitter” was fresh in their minds.

Here’s the most iconic clip for the movie:

We talk about those sleeves? Those sleeves are so unnecessary but iconic. You could literally save a two family from a rainstorm in those sleeves. You could also smuggle children across the boarder without getting stopped for it in those sleeves. Those sleeves are also where the director store all the good acting. Because they are so big, it feel out and got lost.

Overall, this is a massive nostalgia trip and one should enjoy. The acting is bad, the movie isn’t very good, and the actors are the best. It’s the perfect early 2000s movie. Everyone needs to watch this movie. I might be harsh on it but it’s tough love. Love hurts sometimes.

Have any comments about the film, agree about those sleeves, or just want to tell us off? Let us know in the comments below or tweet @Steven_Kaufman. Make sure you also follow us for more.

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Orange is The New Black Review

OITNB

Once in a lifetime there comes a show that you just watch and you’re not really sure why but you like it. That show has come to us in the form of “Orange is the New Black.”  The show isn’t like anything else we have seen on TV, or on Netflix, before.

The show follows Piper Chapman as she has to readjust her life because she is going to prison (hence why the show is called “Orange is the New Black.” She is sentenced to 14 months in prison because she and her ex-girlfriend, who happens to be in there as well, were apart of a drug trafficking. Piper was just charged with Criminal Conspiracy while her ex-girlfriend, Alex Vause (aka Carmen Sandiego), got drug trafficking charges. The show also showcases what’s going on outside of the prison and how Piper’s fiancé and family are dealing with her being in jail.

The show is different from what is normally on TV just because it’s different and in a good way. It showing us prison life and how people from all walks of life making the best out of the situation that they are in.  Some of the cast members are famous from being on extremely popular tv shows/movies. Like Laura Prepon, better known as Donna, plays Alex. So when Alex and Piper get together on the show, I just think in my head “Why Donna why?” There are also “American Pie” actors on the show, a former Star Fleet Captain, and the pregnant girl from “Crossroads” that fell down the steps and forced millions of parents to explain what a miscarriage and bad acting is. The entire cast is very talented.

That same actress also does a wonderful Lindsay Lohan impression on the show. Her character is a crazy religious girl who things that Gods speaks through her because she did so many drugs that it fried her brain. It’s also easy to see that she is drawing inspiration from Lindsay.

What doesn’t work for the show? Not much but somethings when it’s explaining the back story of how one of the characters got to prison, it gets a little confusing. The comedy and the writing is strong but good be stronger. Overall, it’s good show. Fair warning if you are planning on watching it after reading this review, it’s rated TV-MA and has a lot of sex, nudity, and strong language.

 

Rating: 4 bars of soap out of 5

Have an opinion on “Orange is the New Black?” Let us know in the comments below