Let’s Have a Kiki: Giving thanks for Retail workers


Lock the door. Lower the blinds.

It’s been awhile since we had a good old fashion kiki. Lock the doors, lower the blinds,
fire up the smoke machine and put on your heels because it’s going to real up in this mother. I know, exactly what you need today:

For those that aren’t sure what the fuck they are in for, a kiki is a party for calming all your nerves. We’re spilling tea, and dishing just deserts when they deserve. On this edition, we are going to have a nice little chat about today’s holiday: Thanksgiving aka Black Friday.

So today is a day for spending it with your family and friends but yet there are people who are unable to spend it with them because your greed ass wants some great savings on some deals. That’s right, I’m going to go “there” because the people who work in retail are the unsung heroes of the whole holiday weekend. While you are enjoying the meal you prepared, they will be working to make sure you can get your last-minute shit and are able to come in at whatever time on Thanksgiving to shop until you drop.

Do you really think they want to be there? Probably not. Do you really think they want to hear you say “So sorry that you have to work on Thanksgiving” as you ask them for help or check out? That’s like pouring salt into the wound. They wouldn’t be there if you were spending your money there. It’s honestly just better to not say “sorry” but just say “have a wonderful Thanksgiving.” Because if it wasn’t for people like you shopping there on Thanksgiving, then they wouldn’t have to be there on Thanksgiving. Also, if you are there before any sale, don’t bitch and moan about the lines. Actually, don’t bitch and moan about the lines in general because frankly, most places have some sort of self-checkout you are able to use. It’s your own damn fault if you are in that big of a hurry and don’t want to utilize them. It’s not hard to use. Hell, most places have people there to assist you.

Another thing to keep in mind is the fact they have no control over what’s in stock, especially on today. So if they are out of cranberry sauce, you’re not getting any cranberry sauce. They also can’t help if they are out of something in the sale. Everyone knows what to expect on Black Friday. Have a plan B if the item you want in the sale is out. Also, if you aren’t willing to wait in line for the item, then you really didn’t want it. Expect to wait in some kind of line for something you really want. If you don’t want to and just hope there some left over, then you are pretty much saying “I really don’t want it.”

The moral of this kiki is to just be respectful, kind and nice to the people in retail. They are there to help you spent your money. Don’t take your anger or frustration out of them because you didn’t get your item or they have to follow a policy that doesn’t work to your favorite. They are just doing their job and not ruin your day/Christmas because they are assholes. They are assholes, it’s one of the number one requirements to work in retail. But they aren’t assholes to customers, no matter how rude they are. So remember to give thanks for the retail workers you helping you this weekend before you cuss them out. Also, feel free to stand up for them if you see someone cussing them out or treating them like they are less than human. You will make their day because they just have to sit there and take it.

This kiki was…..


Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Make sure you follow me on Twitter for more sass. 


Christmas “comes” too early

christmasdirrty sm.jpg

We as a nation is suffering from Premature Christmulation. It’s what happens when Christmas “comes” too early. It’s affecting 10 in every 20 Americans. As soon as it’s remotely closer to the arrival of the jolly fat man that breaks into your home in order to give you gifts and eat your food, people go bat cray. Like they are already pulling out their Christmas trees and playing songs about the holiday. This is Premature Christmulation.

Instead of just waiting for it to “come” like every other freaking holiday, we try to rush it and celebrate it longer than we do for any other holiday. Do we celebrate Halloween for over two months? No because you are seen wearing a costume any other time, you are called names and viewed as an outcast. But yet, wearing Christmas outfits in November is perfectly acceptable. I get the reasoning behind Christmas and why it’s so important but we need just let it “come” when it does instead of rushing it. Everything is better when you let it “come” naturally.

Rushing it all makes it unwilling when Christmas day “comes.”  By the time it does “arrive,” it’s not as fulfilling and just makes you want to go “is it over yet?” or “Is that it?” If we just let it happen instead of rushing it, it’s so much better.  So don’t suffer from Premature Christmulation, let’s celebrate Christmas once Thanksgiving is over.


Do you have an opinion on the matter? Let us know in the comments below or tweet us @Steven_Kaufman using #PopProject

Months that suck: November


It’s the start of a new month and like the month before it, November sucks and here’s why:

November begins the start of the holiday season and the holiday season brings out the worst in people. People get all bitchy and rude as they go all out to buy their loved ones gift. Literally, people die. It also time for Black Friday. Sure, the deals are amazing but let’s be real-it’s The Hunger Games of retail. It’s a blood sport. Every person for themselves as they wait in line in order to get the best deals.  The irony is that it’s the right after the day that we are supposed to give thanks for all the great things in our life. How does that make any sense?

It’s also more freaking cold than what it was in October. November has the possibility for snow. Snow is a murder that is takes many lives every year. Snow is the personification of evil. It’s a like a Pokemon. Snow can melt and turn into frozen water, also know as Ice. Ice is slippery and can also kill you. So November is also the start of you fearing for your life until April. You might as well just live in a bubble. Yes, I know this is a tad bit overreacting but it’s true!

November is also when we lose an hour because Daylight Savings ends. No one likes loosing an hour of time. We have a hard time managing time to begin with, we don’t need to lose more time. Just because the sun isn’t coming up as early as it did, that doesn’t mean that we need doing something drastic. Do we cut off 4 inches every time we get taller ? No.

This is also the time in the year where it just feels like it drags on and on and on. The weather sucking does help with the never-ending days and that just to drag. This causes seasonal depression and people to drinking, besides the fact that their family is around for too long.

Here’s to another month that sucks!


Have an opinion on November? Let us know in the comments below or tweet us @Steven_Kaufman using #PopProject